The "Mama" Story.

No one's asked me about the story with my real mother. I don't know if anyone cares to even know, but I figured since I blog about her sometimes, and about my "new" family, I'd let everyone know the true, real, whole story. This may be long, so if you make it all the way through, I applaud you. It's sad, it's crazy, and it's a heartbreaking story. I'm not asking for your sympathy vote. This happened almost 6 years ago. I have not once seen a social worker or anything in that matter because of this. Even though I probably should have, I've overcame a lot. I've been through a lot more than a normal teenager has. So I'll start from the beginning.

My Mama (Linda) and Daddy (Joe) met in their early 20's in Dallas, Texas. They married at 25 in my Grandpa's back yard in Illinois when they recently moved there. My daddy was a realastate apprasier and my Mama worked at a furniture store. They tried for 5 years when they finally got pregnant with me. I almost died at birth, from reasons I won't discuss. One nurse told my dad everything would be fine, and the other told him to make funeral arrangements. Needless to save, the first nurse was right. I'm well, and I've never had problems.

A few years later when I was almost 3 years old, my brother, Andrew Cody was born. My dad coached a little league football team for a hobby, and one of his football players were hit and killed my a drunk driver. My brother was named after him - Andrew -. My mama's family lived in Alabama were she was born and raised, and my Daddy's in Texas. The only family they had in Illinois was my dad's father, my Grandpa. My parents had a good life together. After my brother was born, we bought a nice house, my Mama quit her job and became a SAHM, and my Daddy owned his own appraising business.

As my brother and I got older, we joined sports. He played football, I was a cheerleader, we had an All-American family. My mama's best friend's name Linda, as well as her own name. Linda and my Mama met another woman, Bobbie, and the 3 of them were close, until Linda realized Bobbie wasn't a good person. Bobbie (female) had a male friend named Bobby. My mama was very nice to this Bobby man, but we just thought she was being a kind hearted person. This Bobby man packed his things up and moved to California, and gambled all his money away, and was living as a homeless person. My mama and daddy felt bad for him, payed for him to come back home to Illinois.

Bobby moved into our basement, just for awhile though. I was in 8th grade, my brother in 5th. We later on stopped hearing from Bobby. Nothing was strange about it, we didn't think anything of it. One morning before school, my brother and I were getting ready. I didn't have a cell phone yet, my parent's didn't think I needed one. I was only 13. Instead of a cell phone, I had my own land line number. I had a pink phone that stayed in my room, and my own answering machine. I thought it was pretty bad ass truthfully. I heard my mama in her room calling someone "baby" and "I'll see you soon.", "I miss you too", "We'll figure it all out." I knew something wasn't right.

I took my pink phone, ran into the basement and called my Daddy. I asked him if he was just talking to Mama, and when he said no, I told him everything I had heard. My brother was sitting by her room, taking mental notes of anything she had said while I was downstairs. I wasn't trying to split my parents up, I was trying to help them. I didn't know any better. All I remember left of that day, was my Daddy came home. They took us to school, and I remember him telling my Mama they were going on a drive to talk about things.

I remember one day my Daddy told me to get all my special belongings and give them to him. He went in my Mommy's jewelery box too, and took out special things. I later found out her send these to my Grandmother in Alabama, to keep them safe, to make sure they were never pawned off.

A couple days later, my Mama told me she got a restraining order on my Daddy for verbal abuse. I didn't understand this. To this day, I know for a fact, my Daddy never yelled at her. Ever. He's never even yelled at my Brother and I. He's a gentle, kind person. I don't think he has the heart to yell. I was confused. That night was my 8th grade graduation dance. It was the first time ever my parents bought me a special dress, I got my nails proffesionally done, and my hair. I was so excited. My mama took me and dropped me off. I was having such a great time, when I was called up to where the DJ is, and I saw the school cop. He took me outside were I saw 3 more cop cars, and my daddy, crying. My Daddy told me he loved me but he couldn't see or talk to me for 2 weeks. He told me he'd get it all straightened out and everything would be OK. He was my best friend. I was daddy's little girl, and I was heart broken. I didn't understand what was going on.

I sat in the bathroom of my Middle school with my best friend, Breana, and just cried with her. She grew up with my family, so she knew how upsetting this was. I went home that night like nothing happened. When I woke up, it was another story. I didn't hate my mama for what she did. I was confused, I didn't exactly know what was going on. I got out of bed, and I tried going into my mama's room, to jump on her bed and tell her about my night at the Graduation dance. She wouldn't let me in her room. I thought she was just messing with me, so I finally got through the door and jumped on the bed, when I realized why she didn't want me coming in. Bobby was in my parents bed. I was horrified. I jumped out, grabbed my -new- cell phone, and ran down the street in just a over-sized t-shirt and underwear. I called my Daddy so many times, but he wasn't answering. I had to get out of there, I wanted to be with my Daddy. He went to the police station and told them I was calling him, and they allowed him to answer. (Keep in mind there was a restraining order, so he wasn't allowed to answer my calls-. I talked to the police officer and told them I wanted to be with my Daddy, so a Police officer, and my daddy came and picked me up.

I wasn't informed of much when I was that age. My father told me more of what happened once I got older. My father and i lived with my grandpa for awhile until he found a house. I spent that summer one week with him, then one week with my mom. My dad told me to give Bobby a chance. I hated Bobby, but I did what my Daddy told me. I gave him a chance, until I saw him hit my Mama. My dad got full custody of my brother and I, and we later just went to my mom's house of weekends. Once my father thought I was old enough to understand, he told me. My mama was addicted to Crack Cocaine. Even though she was, he didn't keep my brother and I from her. This bobby man ruined and broke my family up. He got my Mama addicted to Crack Cocaine, and beat her.

My mama is still off and on with Bobby. I haven't stayed the night with her in years. We don't have a "mother/daughter" relationship, it's more of a friend relationship. I got to Jaci when I need motherly advice. My daddy has down his damn hardest, and a pretty damn good job raising my brother and I. He's done so much for my brother and I, more than he had to, and I love him so much for that. He stopped coaching football for awhile, and he loved football, just to take care of my brother and I. he worked extra hard for extra money. He put me in a good high school. He's bought be 4 cars (because I'm an idiot and totaled one, and the rest are another story). He's done everything in his power to make sure my brother and I have a good life.

My mama says she's clean. I'm not 100 percent sure I believe her, but she may be. She's lied to me too many times for me to believe anything she really says, but I hope she is. We still talk quite a few times every week. I still love her so much, but I'll always have hurt from her. She's hurt me more than anyone in this world, but I've forgiven her.

I've taken this situation as a life lesson. I will make sure my children have a mother their whole lives, and I will be the best mother I can possibly be. My mother showed me what not to do, and I thank her for that.