Am I good enough?

I'm so in love with my husband. The moment I laid my eyes on him I knew something special was going to happen, and I couldn't get enough of him the first night we layed by each others side and talked until the sun came up, literally. And I'll never forget our first kiss, ever. It's the only "first kisses" I've ever remembered, but that same exact kiss has never happened again. It literally made me feel like I was floating or dreaming or something. It was a fairy tale in real life and I'll never forget it. My husband is my dream come true. On June 24th, 2011 I made a promise I will forever keep, and I'm so in love with just being his wife.

Sometimes I don't feel like the feelings are mutual. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the way of things, or annoying, or anything that could make things not right. I try to be 100 percent perfect for my husband because I'm literally terrified to lose him. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest when he's just on duty for 24 hours, or when he's out of town for four days. I literally feel like I want to cry all the time because I miss him so much it hurts.

Sometimes I feel like he doesn't give me the attention I need. The attention I crave. I ask him all the time if he is still in love with me. Shouldn't I already know he is? I shouldn't have to ask, right? It broke my heart when he told me he was singing last night. Silly right? He used to sing to me, and the way he would look at me when he sang to me showed me how in love he was with me. I miss seeing how much he's in love with me in his eyes, because I don't see it anymore. He hasn't sang to me in over a year.

He comes home and shows his iPad more attention than to me, at least that's how I feel.

I miss feeling like I'm all he will ever need in life. I want to feel needed, and not feel like I'm just in the way. I feel like him getting married to me and me being pregnant with Audrey is holding him back in some way, and I feel like he resents me for it.

Ive tried so many times to talk to him about it, but I feel like I get no where.